Tuesday, March 24, 2015
I have no shame in admitting my fear. I'm afraid of constant pain. I'm afraid of the unknown. I'm afraid I will never be physically whole again.
It was that fear which kept me from any doctors' offices for quite a long time. Fear that there was something really wrong with me. Fear that there was nothing wrong, and my symptoms were all in my head. How's that for dichotomy?
I feel just like Peter in Matthew 14:26-31. I see Jesus out there walking calmly on the water, and I come to him, only I am distracted by the wind [my fears] so I take my eyes off my Jesus.
He's not willing to allow me to go under, however. Guess what? He loves me too much! He saves me from myself by reaching out, grabbing hold of me and guiding me into his calm presence.
What a gift of mercy which I can never repay. Though I am still in the midst of some disconcerting circumstances. I realize I've never been abandoned, for that, in the same way I am unashamed of my fear, I am unashamed to say I am well and truly blessed.
Isaiah 41:10 New Living Translation (NLT)
Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.